We are here because you were there And that's really what it comes down to..
Not metaphorically. Not poetically. Literally.
Every time someone asks, "How did you get started?That said, you were there. " or "What made you decide to write about this?Here's the thing — " the answer always circles back to a moment — a place, a conversation, a decision made in a specific room on a specific day. And because you were there, we're here.
So let's talk about how presence becomes purpose. How showing up changes everything — not just for you, but for everyone who comes after.
What Is "We Are Here Because You Were There"
This isn't a slogan. It's a recognition.
It’s the understanding that every significant moment in someone’s journey begins with a single act of showing up. Whether that’s walking into a coffee shop where a mentor happens to sit next to you, or staying late at the office to help a colleague finish a project, or simply being honest about not knowing something. These moments don’t just shape the person who’s there — they ripple outward Simple, but easy to overlook. Practical, not theoretical..
And yeah — that's actually more nuanced than it sounds Small thing, real impact..
I’ve watched this play out countless times. But a friend once told me, "I wouldn’t be writing this book if I hadn’t gone to that conference in 2018. " Another said, "My career changed because I had lunch with someone who wasn’t even in my industry.Worth adding: " They weren’t doing anything extraordinary. They were just present.
The official docs gloss over this. That's a mistake.
Presence isn’t passive. It’s active. It’s choosing to engage instead of withdraw. Also, it’s saying yes when you could say no. It’s showing your real self in a room full of polished versions of others Simple, but easy to overlook..
The Architecture of Influence
Think about influence like a chain. Break one link, and the chain weakens. So naturally, each link is a person who decided to be somewhere, do something, or have a conversation. Strengthen it, and the whole thing holds more weight.
You might think influence only flows downward — from experts to novices, from leaders to followers. But it doesn’t. It flows sideways, upward, and sometimes even backward. The person you help today might be the one who helps someone else tomorrow. And the person you inspire might never even know your name Turns out it matters..
But they’ll know the difference your presence made.
Why This Matters
Here’s the thing most people miss: You don’t need to be famous to matter. Worth adding: you don’t need to be loud or polished or perfectly put together. You just need to be there.
And when you are, something shifts.
I remember sitting in a workshop a few years ago. The facilitator kept asking participants to share their stories, but most people stayed quiet. Then she called on a quiet woman in the back row. The woman hesitated, then shared a story about failing her first startup. That said, by the end, half the room was nodding. Someone in the front said, "I thought I was the only one who felt that way.
Quick note before moving on.
That woman didn’t know she was giving permission. She didn’t realize she was making space for others to be real. But she was.
That’s the power of being there. It’s contagious Worth keeping that in mind..
The Ripple Effect of Authenticity
When you show up as yourself — flaws and all — you give others permission to do the same. And that’s where real connection happens. That’s where growth begins.
Most people wear masks in professional settings. They smile when they’re not sure what to say. Here's the thing — they nod along when they don’t fully agree. They stay quiet when they have questions Most people skip this — try not to. Which is the point..
But when you drop the mask — even just a little — you create a vacuum. And others fill it with their own honesty.
I’ve seen this happen in boardrooms, in classrooms, in therapy sessions. The moment someone says, "I don’t know," or "I’m struggling with this," something magical happens: Everyone else exhales Nothing fancy..
Because they’ve been waiting for permission to feel human too Easy to understand, harder to ignore..
How Presence Becomes Purpose
Let’s get practical for a second It's one of those things that adds up..
You want to understand how your presence matters? Start tracking these moments.
The Coffee Shop Conversations
You know those random conversations that change everything? Consider this: the ones that start with "Mind if I sit here? " or "Have you tried the avocado toast?" Those aren’t accidents. They’re opportunities disguised as inconvenience.
I’ve had conversations in coffee shops that led to book deals, partnerships, and friendships that lasted years. None of them were planned. I just happened to be there — listening, curious, willing to be distracted from my to-do list.
Presence in these moments isn’t about being busy or important. It’s about being available Not complicated — just consistent..
The Late-Night Texts
Sometimes being there means answering a text at 11 p.Now, m. Someone’s struggling. But they need to talk. You could sleep. Which means you could scroll past their message. But you reply.
I’ve had late-night conversations that became the foundation of someone’s business. That’s not because I had brilliant insights. It’s because I was there It's one of those things that adds up..
And here’s what I’ve learned: The person who shows up in the hard moments becomes someone’s anchor. They become proof that they’re not alone.
The "Yes" That Changes Everything
Every big shift in my life has started with a yes Surprisingly effective..
Yes to a meeting I wasn’t excited about. Which means yes to a project that felt beneath me. Yes to a collaboration that didn’t make immediate sense.
And every time, something unexpected happened. Ideas merged. Opportunities appeared. Paths I never would have chosen opened up Most people skip this — try not to..
Because presence creates possibility.
Common Mistakes People Make
Here’s what most people get wrong when it comes to being present:
They Wait for the "Right" Moment
Newsflash: There’s no perfect time to show up. The moment you think, "Now is when I should speak up," someone else has already moved on.
Presence isn’t strategic. And it’s spontaneous. On top of that, it’s showing up when you don’t feel like it. When you’re tired. When you’re unsure. When the timing feels off.
Because timing is an illusion anyway And that's really what it comes down to..
They Underestimate Small Moments
You don’t need a stage to matter. You don’t need an audience of hundreds to create impact Less friction, more output..
Sometimes the most profound influence happens in a five-minute conversation. In practice, in a shared glance. In a single sentence that lands just right.
I’ve met people who changed my entire perspective in the time it takes to walk to the bus stop.
They Confuse Visibility with Presence
Posting on social media isn’t the same as being there. Speaking up in meetings isn’t the same as listening deeply. Having followers isn’t the same as having impact And that's really what it comes down to..
Real presence is quiet. Here's the thing — it’s felt. It’s noticed by people who need to feel less alone.
What Actually Works
So how do you cultivate this kind of presence? How do you make sure you’re the person who shows up when it matters?
Be Curious, Not Just Available
Curiosity is the engine of meaningful connection. But ask questions. Which means listen to understand, not just to reply. Let people tell you their stories without interrupting Small thing, real impact..
I’ve learned that the best conversations happen when you stop trying to fix things and start trying to understand them.
Show Up Consistently, Not Just Spectacularly
You don’t need to be dramatic. You just need to be regular.
Comment on a colleague’s post. Send a quick note to someone you admire. Attend events even when you don’t know anyone That's the part that actually makes a difference..
Consistency builds trust. And trust is the foundation of real influence.
Embrace Discomfort
The best presence happens in the uncomfortable moments. The meeting where you feel like an outsider. Still, the conversation where you don’t have anything clever to add. The event where you’d rather be home.
That’s exactly when you should show up.
Because that’s where someone else needs you most.
FAQ
Q: What if I’m an introvert? Do I have to be social to be present?
Not at all. It’s about being authentic. Presence isn’t about being outgoing. An introvert can be deeply present by listening more than speaking, by offering thoughtful questions, by simply being fully engaged in small interactions. Sometimes the quietest presence is the most powerful.
Q: How do I measure whether my presence matters?
You can’t — and shouldn’t try. On top of that, impact isn’t always visible or immediate. But you’ll know when it’s happening because you’ll feel it. Day to day, that moment when someone looks at you and says, "I feel seen. " That’s when you’ll know you were there for the right reason.
**Q:
Q: What if I’m not sure what to say in important moments?
You don’t need the perfect words. Often, simply saying "I'm here" or "That sounds really difficult" is enough. Presence isn't about having answers—it's about offering your attention and care Nothing fancy..
Q: How do I balance being present for others while taking care of myself?
Set boundaries without withdrawing completely. You can care deeply without carrying everyone else's burdens. Show up authentically, but don't lose yourself in the process.
Q: Can I practice presence in my daily routine?
Absolutely. On the flip side, start small—make eye contact during conversations, put your phone away during meals, or take a moment to really listen when someone speaks. These tiny acts compound into meaningful connections.
Final Thoughts
Presence isn't a grand gesture or a performance. This leads to it's a choice to be fully where you are, with whoever you're with, regardless of the circumstances. It's choosing to show up even when it's inconvenient, uncomfortable, or uncelebrated That's the whole idea..
The world doesn't need more noise—it needs more presence. More people willing to sit in silence with someone who's hurting. More people willing to ask "How are you, really?" and actually wait for the answer. More people willing to trade perfection for authenticity.
Because here's what I've learned: the moments that matter most aren't the ones we plan or post about. They're the ones where we choose to be genuinely, imperfectly, consistently there.
And that choice—that's what creates ripples that last long after we're gone.
